Experiencing technological atrophy?
Lying to people at parties about your difficulties with Snow Leopard, but don’t really know what it is?
Think a hash tag is really a fancy way of ordering hash browns?
When someone asks you to Poken, do you reluctantly take off your clothes?
Well say good-bye to these embarrassing little mishaps, for a mere signing fee and monthly retainer you can have my patent pending iTouch you life app. I will remedy your technological atrophy and bring you up to speed. I will even sync your iPhone with your Outlook calendar and organize your iTunes to the Library of Congress standards.
Order now through Skype.
*Note: Palm Pilot is not the same as an iPhone.