Rich people problems

Standard

Can you pay my bills? Can you pay my telephone bills? Can you pay my automo’ bills?

If you’ve answered yes, they you’re rich. Or want to sleep with me. Or both.

Bills are a problem for the majority of people, myself included. Well, not the actual bills. More like the method of paying them. But, after musing about the types of problems I’d have if paying bills weren’t an issue, I think I’d stick to avoiding the 1-800 calls of collectors.

This is the second of a three-part series dedicated to the problems that only the most annoying and ridiculous groups of people consider crippling.

The problems of rich people:

  • The inability to decide what car to take to the party.
  • Getting hurt when jumping into a pool of gold coins.
  • The tennis coach is out-of-town.
  • Desperately trying to buy a lap giraffe.
  • Not having anything new to wear to the country club.
  • The valet is full and therefore must self park.
  • Deciding where to summer.
  • Getting the stains made by your cheap True Religion jeans out of the leather seats of your Bentley.
  • Being bored. All. The. Time.
  • Losing count at $1,543,893.13
  • Realizing that Picasso is dead and unable to paint your portrait.
  • Lawyers cannot confirm if you will be able to take your riches into the afterlife.
  • Not knowing if people really like you for who you are.
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