Week 2 of the #WorldCup: Losers are Winners

The 2014 FIFA World Cup is now two weeks old, but I’m no where nearer to being an expert. As a matter of fact, the only team I was certain would advance was embarrassingly sent home with a bitten player. So, again, the only thing I know about this sport is that I know nothing.

Here’s a recap of my favorite things this week:

1. Biters

I mean, seriously. Why even bite around the bush? The biggest story this week was that an Uruguayan player came out as a vampire.

“@telegraph_sport: #Suarez “Anyone got a toothpick? I got Chiellini stuck in my teeth” pic.twitter.com/fbyFr215SR” @RiffRamm @_Acruz56 lol

— Marco (@Markoh52) June 25, 2014

 

#Suarez an appeal… pic.twitter.com/rloFMCTkAm

— telegraph_sport (@telegraph_sport) June 25, 2014

 

Gold “@TotallyMUFC: Best one yet? #Suarez pic.twitter.com/4YFkV3cvoC”

— amanda lulham (@amandalulham) June 25, 2014

 

Maybe Luis Suarez was as distraught as I was that Italy bit the dust. At which point, I can’t blame him.

 

2. Tears

There was a poignant moment in the Colombia vs. Japan game when the replacement goalie came on the field to become the oldest player in World Cup history, but more importantly, to redeem himself after a heartbreaking loss in the 90’s.

Mondragon in1998 when Colombia were eliminated by England. 16 years later he makes it back to the WC! #Legend pic.twitter.com/9tUJjzE6YD

— Jäy (@JayZinho98) June 24, 2014

 

3. Dumped

Half of Europe is on a plane home, and the other half is on their way to Brazil.

Although Spain, England, Portugal, and Italy have all been eliminated, their fans can temporarily cheer for Greece. That’s right, the Ivory Coast lost to Greece after a successful penalty kick in the dying minutes of their match. All because of a “foul” called on this play:

At least they are lucky.

 

4. Love/Hate

Cristiano Ronaldo taketh and giveth World Cup hopes. His fancy haircut scored a goal that secured the United States’ spot in the knock-out round.

Thank you Ronaldo! #USA pic.twitter.com/86MRjEX7fd

— Ridiculousness (@WeLoveRobDyrdek) June 26, 2014

 

5. This week’s winner is…

U-S-A! U-S-A! U-S-A! Despite the rhetoric of failing forward or losing to win, what this team has been able to accomplish is pretty impressive, against very daunting odds.

Now leading http://t.co/00L7Ahb7S3 #Merica pic.twitter.com/rCaRvB4G2R

— BuzzFeed (@BuzzFeed) June 26, 2014

 

Read last week’s recap here.